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130Episodes
Comedy

Writer buds Mike Knoll and Madison Jones pitch sequel and prequel ideas for films that they think deserve one. They’re wrong. Releases every Monday.

Episodes

October 18, 2021

Clue 2: Dead End Drive

Long story short (too late) The Equelizers roll the dice on their sequel to Clue! This week has it all: The Anti-Horny, The Clue-Man Group, and Madison tries to kill Angela Lansbury.

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

 

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*spooky pipe organ music* *crash of lightning* *the sound of spooky moaning* *a blood-curdling scream* 
Oh sorry, Freakquels! We didn't see you come in. This week we are treating you to a new monster of a sequel as we unwrap and repackage The Mummy (2017). This week has it all; A remake of one of the show's historic bits, satanic glass, and Madison talks about crystals again.

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Madison galaxy brains 2013's Great Gatsby  as we leap into Leo's filmography and take another another bite out of The Big Apple in Great Gatsby and the Quantum Romp! This week has it all: Muppet What Ifs, Déjà vu reviews, and we leap back to put right an audio issue that went wrong!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

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Ain't we got fun? Well, we have a special two-week dose of your and everybody's favorite mysterious party host, Jay Gatsby. This week Mike pitches the next adventure in West Egg, where the man has risen from the grave to hold one final bash. This week has it all; Sexy Harrison Ford, bursting balloon metaphors, and we return to the old garden patch! Don't miss it, Old Sport!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Madison R Jones
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes
"Vroom Vroom" by Charli XCX

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September 13, 2021

About Time: Desmond‘s Creed

It's the time traveling sequel no one asked for slammed into an assassin based franchise no one wanted us to return to as The Equelizers go back in time for dear Uncle Desmond in About Time: Desmond's Creed! This week has it all: DramaRomComs, WE really back ourselves into a corner on this one, and odnoM lI saves the day!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Mike Knoll
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

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September 6, 2021

On the Origin of Monkeybone

We dive deep into this week and ponder, "Why make a sequel to the horribly panned and bad movie Monkeybone (2001) when we could just make The Silmarillion for it?" This week has it all; The Monkeybonarillion, a gender-neutral realm god, and we talk about what the Equelizers Cinematic Universe's hell should be.

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Madison Jones
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

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There's no prison on Monkey Earth that can keep The Equelizers in as they race to get their Planet of the Apes sequel to the world! This week has it all: No Mark Wahlberg, The United Apes of Aperica, and seriously just the least amount of Marky Mark possible.

 

Madison's audio is a little off on this one. It looks like maybe the audio is coming from their computer mic. We cleaned it up as best we could but it's still noticeable in some places.

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Madison Jones
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

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August 16, 2021

Star Kid 2: TURBO TEENS

Grind up your hamburgers and turn them into cake pop-shaped protein spheres with us this week as we AMPLIFY the sequel to Star Kid (1997). This week has it all; Puppets!, Madison’s last wishes, and rad motocross jumps!

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Madison Jones
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

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Water. Earth. Fire. Air. Sequels. Only the Equelizers are masters of all five elements but only because no one's ever tried all of them. That changes in The Last Airbender 2: Welcome to Earth!

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Intro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

 

Racebending:  Fan Activists Fight Racist Casting

The Incomparable Differences between Whitewashing and Racebending

Decoding the Politics of Hollywood Whitewashing through M. Night Shyamalan’s The Last Airbender

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We got a little too in our heads this as we answer Jackson's challenge to make a sequel to Charlie Kaufman's Being John Malkovich (1999). This week has it all; Fun airplane battles, everyone's favorite movie Mary Reilly (1996), and...and...and yeah, that's about it. Enjoy!

Click here to go to that website Mike mentioned, DoesTheDogDie.com, which has crowdsourced emotional spoilers for movies, tv, books, and more.

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Madison Jones

Intro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

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