The Equelizers Podcast

Stargate 2: The Mallmighty Dollar

Get your ancient symbols in a line and step with us through the gate to the warptacular sequel to Stargate (1994). As suggested by friend of the show Chelce Carter in last week's episode, the Equelizers wade deep into the dead waters of capitalism's past *gasp* I hope we don't see a ghost!

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Madison Jones

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

You can find Chelce on Twitter at @MrsCarterOfMars

 

 

Artemis Fowl: Into the Fowlverse

So here's the thing, here's the thing. In my house? The Equelizers are joined by special guest Chelce Carter to steal back the glamor of Artemis Fowl! This week has it all: METAPHORS!, we're hacks, and one of us is an Opal Koboi apologist! You'll have to listen to almost the whole thing to find out who!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

You can find Chelce on Twitter at @MrsCarterOfMars

Cyrano de Little Vampire

Prepare to woo your sweetheart as The Equelizers hide in the bushes and whisper advice as they dig into 2000's The Little Vampire! This week has it all: The role Lipnicki was destined to play, phonems, and a blast of 1980's slang!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

 

Lord of World of Warcraft

Oh wow! The Equelizers nailed down a pitch in under an hour. Oh wow! Thanks to our guest Art last week, the Equelizers were tasked with getting back into the cage with Cage to come up with a sequel to the semi-biopic Lord of War (2005). This week has it all! Everquest Online, crush bone belts, and the Equelizers record for finalizing a pitch.

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Madison Jones

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

Christmas Do-Over 2: It’s Actually Earth Day

Just when The Equelizers thought they'd put Christmas behind them, enemy of the podcast Art Cooper pulls them back into the holiday season again...and again...and again...it's a time loop joke. This week has it all: Art's three straight marriages, a senator's teenage dog, and just some light Eco-terrorism this time!

 

You can find Art's other work at:

Alphabet Flight

Creepy Critters

Over Innsmouth

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

Flatliners (1900)

CW: Suicide, addiction, murder, death, drug use, regret. Due to the topic of grief that this film franchise heavily covers, we mention and discuss harder topics that happen in both the films we watched and the film we pitch.

This week, the Equelizers join Elliot Page, Kiefer Sutherland, and John Boyega in THE BEYOND with their requel prequel to the Flatliners franchise in a turn of the century take that not even the most heightened medium could have fortold. We are looking at you, Patricia Arquette. 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Madison R Jones

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

The Last Ride of Cat Ballou

♫Well now Freakquels, just lend an ear
For you're now about to hear
The Last Ride of Cat Ballou
It's a podcast episode that's newly made
And Madison "Liquids"Jones
And the Tomater Kid are going to describe it for you
Cat Ballou, Cat Ballou
The Last Ride of Cat Ball-ou-ou-ou♫

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Madison R Jones

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

 

The Matrix: Revelations

A new year means new chances as The Equelizers throw out the sequels to The Matrix and bring their own philosophy to the table. What is the sound of one hand falling in the forest if no one's around to hear it? This week has it all: Madison's full Muppets cast, The Matrix: The Musical, and a new game!

Articles tackling The Wachowski's prevous Racism controversys

Hollywood’s whitewashed version of anime never sells

The Problem With Sense8

An Open Letter to Trans Communities and our Co-Conspirators

‘Cloud Atlas’ and the Use of ‘Yellowface’, is It Okay?

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

Holly Star 2: Trees Company Up On Puppet Hill — The Awakening

Sorry for the delay on this one, Freakquels. Our strings got pulled in ten different directions by the holidays and sudden day-job changes, but we are happy to bring you our last episode of 2021! This week Madison and Mike go head-to-head as they each do their best to deck the Hallmarks with their sequels to the puppet-packed Xmas snore that is Holly Star (2018). To judge this final head to head of the year is our frequent guest and sometimes kidnapped friend Jackson Eflin.

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison R Jones

Edited by Madison R Jones

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"

Just Another Christmas In Space

We wrap up Christmas in Space with the Brazilian gem Just Another Christmas...in space! This week has it all, More Tom Hanks, we meet Gargalax's wife and children, and the return of Madison Claus!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Special thanks to the BananaBoyes for the use of our them "Two Step Struttin'"