The Equelizers Podcast

The Great Gatsby: The Oldest Sport

Ain't we got fun? Well, we have a special two-week dose of your and everybody's favorite mysterious party host, Jay Gatsby. This week Mike pitches the next adventure in West Egg, where the man has risen from the grave to hold one final bash. This week has it all; Sexy Harrison Ford, bursting balloon metaphors, and we return to the old garden patch! Don't miss it, Old Sport!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Madison R Jones
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes
"Vroom Vroom" by Charli XCX

About Time: Desmond‘s Creed

It's the time traveling sequel no one asked for slammed into an assassin based franchise no one wanted us to return to as The Equelizers go back in time for dear Uncle Desmond in About Time: Desmond's Creed! This week has it all: DramaRomComs, WE really back ourselves into a corner on this one, and odnoM lI saves the day!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Mike Knoll
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

On the Origin of Monkeybone

We dive deep into this week and ponder, "Why make a sequel to the horribly panned and bad movie Monkeybone (2001) when we could just make The Silmarillion for it?" This week has it all; The Monkeybonarillion, a gender-neutral realm god, and we talk about what the Equelizers Cinematic Universe's hell should be.

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Madison Jones
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

Planet of the Apes 2: See No Evil

There's no prison on Monkey Earth that can keep The Equelizers in as they race to get their Planet of the Apes sequel to the world! This week has it all: No Mark Wahlberg, The United Apes of Aperica, and seriously just the least amount of Marky Mark possible.

 

Madison's audio is a little off on this one. It looks like maybe the audio is coming from their computer mic. We cleaned it up as best we could but it's still noticeable in some places.

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Madison Jones
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

Star Kid 2: TURBO TEENS

Grind up your hamburgers and turn them into cake pop-shaped protein spheres with us this week as we AMPLIFY the sequel to Star Kid (1997). This week has it all; Puppets!, Madison’s last wishes, and rad motocross jumps!

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones
Edited by Madison Jones
Intro and Outro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

The Last Airbender 2: Welcome to Earth

Water. Earth. Fire. Air. Sequels. Only the Equelizers are masters of all five elements but only because no one's ever tried all of them. That changes in The Last Airbender 2: Welcome to Earth!

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Intro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

 

Racebending:  Fan Activists Fight Racist Casting

The Incomparable Differences between Whitewashing and Racebending

Decoding the Politics of Hollywood Whitewashing through M. Night Shyamalan’s The Last Airbender

John Malkovich is John Malkovich

We got a little too in our heads this as we answer Jackson's challenge to make a sequel to Charlie Kaufman's Being John Malkovich (1999). This week has it all; Fun airplane battles, everyone's favorite movie Mary Reilly (1996), and...and...and yeah, that's about it. Enjoy!

Click here to go to that website Mike mentioned, DoesTheDogDie.com, which has crowdsourced emotional spoilers for movies, tv, books, and more.

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Madison Jones

Intro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

Stick It 2: The Restitution of Hailey Graham

The Equelizers get a one tenth deduction for having their Jackson Eflin showing as they pitch Stick It 2: The Restitution of Hailey Graham. This week has it all: Arnold Schwarzeneggar, The Vickerman Wicker Man, and the tie-in no one will see coming!

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Mike Knoll

Intro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

The playlist for Jackson's soundtrack can be found here

You can find the Gratuitous Pausing episode where Mike correctly picked the better sports movie here!

Space Jam: A New Legacy Original Writers Commentary™

Surprise Freakquels! We did it again! Another popular streaming service picked up the rights to one of our pitches. The problem this time, though, is that we weren't allowed on set during the production. Join us as we watch and react to Space Jam: A New Legacy for the first time while discussing the various changes with a new friend/business partner. If you didn't catch our original Space Jam 2 pitch way back in 2018, you can listen to it here.

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison R Jones

Edited by Madison R Jones

"Slamilton" by Psynwav

"A Space Jam of Their Own"

Batter up and hear our call! It's time for the Equelizers and some old TV friends to play ball. Grab a hot dog, a beer, and some nostalgia as we pitch (get it?) as sequel to the classic A League of Their Own (1992). This week has it all; Mike gushes over Babaloo Mandel's career. mole men, and a gadget that is "very expensive".

 

Hosted by Mike Knoll and Madison Jones

Edited by Madison R Jones

Intro Song "Two Step Struttin'" by Banana Boyes 

"It Had to Be You" clip sung by Frank Sinatra